I’m not sure why, but for a long time I felt my long hair was a defining feature of my identity. Maybe it was. It had gotten so long and after I had bleached some of it a couple of times, there were places in my hair that there just completely wrecked.

I don’t know what came over me, but I started feeling like I needed a change. I loved my hair, but in this heat, it was so hot. I wasn’t able to ever wear it down really because it was instant overheating. I did love being able to braid it and do different things with it.

I was just ready though.

I proposed the idea to B. I don’t know why I cared what he thought, but I did. He was a bit hesitant. Weirdly, that sort of propelled me forward into doing it. He told me I would regret doing it, and I knew he was right. I really did. I knew I would regret cutting it all.

I also knew it was hair and it would grow back. Starting over with my hair would actually be good. It was damaged and needed a new start.

I went to the salon in the mall next door. The one I normally go to wasn’t opened on Mondays. I think that may have been a good thing because I really liked what this guy did.

I won’t lie, I was having heart palpitations as he was hacking away chunks of my hair, but it was a new adventure. Besides, it’s hair. It will grow back.

It took the guy a couple hours to cut my hair. He said it was so different from Asian hair. Softer and more fine. I’ve never had my hair described as fine. =]

In the end, I haven’t regretted it at all. I love being able to have curls that will stay. I love not overheating. I love not getting my hair stuck in weird places.

I feel like a different person (though I know I’m not). I feel a bit more comfortable with myself. I miss my long hair at times, but the regret isn’t there like I thought it would be. I’m excited to see what else I can do with my hair.

Next step is to redye my hair. I’m thinking of possibly doing purple and pink in chunks. We’ll see.